Kids Unplugged

“Hey, we like each other. Is that so odd?”

Our son was taking a long shower, and so my wife yelled to him, “Make sure you don’t drown.”

Our youngest daughter, who had just finished showering, said not to worry because her brother wouldn’t drown. [Continue Reading…]

Where’s the Beef?

“Just tell me where to go, please.”

My four-ton dog loves to hang out at the side of our beach house when a neighbor does a barbecue.

Scraps may come her way, and so she parks herself at the fence, looking as meek and longingly famished as possible. “How sweet” is the phrase she tries to extract from the neighbors, because that most likely means a bone or a piece of meat will come flying her way. [Continue Reading…]

Toilet Marksmanship

“Hey, he’ll blame us next.”

We stopped to buy coffee at a restaurant on a road trip, and my son and I went to the toilet.

As we stood next to each other at the urinals, my 11-year-old son looked over at me suddenly and said, “Oh, god! There’s a spider climbing up my leg.” [Continue Reading…]